Discouraged, I spoke with Valerie on Monday the 12th of July about my options. I am 40w1d at the appointment. She checked my cervix and I am 3cm dilated, 70% effaced, cervix is about mid position and very soft but the baby is at a –3station. I feel like that is wonderful news even though I know it could still be a week or so. I really want her to be there for my birth but she is planning to be out of town for the week. She will get home on Sunday. So we schedule an induction for 6am Monday, I would be 1 day shy of 41wk. I figure that if I make it to 41wk I might as well have her induce me so that I can have her be there instead of Dr. Meline. But really I want to deliver before the induction. We talked about some natural induction methods. I asked about castor oil and she said she wasn’t sure of the dosage, and for me to check online or with my Bradley instructor. My Mom and I go to Wal-mart and buy castor oil. I am still not sure I will actually take the castor oil, but I want it on hand just incase.
I called my Bradley instructor that morning and she said that what I find online is probably fine for dosage. She also reminds me to trust my body and my baby and that I will likely go into labor long before the induction. On Tuesday night Tim & I talk about our options and we decide that I will take the castor oil in the morning. We both want to avoid the medical induction and feel that the castor oil might take more than once to actually work. We wanted to make sure we had enough time to do the castor oil once, let my body recover for a day or so and then try again. I was really hoping that we wouldn’t have to do it twice, but I knew I would if push came to shove and the induction was looming.
On Wednesday the 14th I woke up and had some breakfast. Around 10am I decide to do it. I get a 16 oz glass and pour 4 oz of castor oil in the glass. Then I fill the rest of the glass with Orange juice. I stir it up and all at once guzzle it down. I followed it with a chaser of some more OJ. My mouth feels all oily and gross. (I can still taste the oil and feel my stomach turn as I write this). I wipe my mouth out with a washcloth and immediately go brush my teeth. I know I have to keep it down if it is going to work. I am REALLY hoping that I don’t have to do THAT again! Within an hour I was running to the bathroom with diarrhea. I would not suggest ever taking Castor oil with OJ. It burns when it comes out! LOL! So after I would get off the potty I would climb into the shower/tub and have a baking soda sitz bath and then rinse off in the shower. My butt was raw. So I was using diaper cream after every trip to the potty to protect my skin. This went on for about 6 hours. When Tim got home from work I was so sick to my stomach. He watched Kaleb and I tried to get some rest. When I woke up I finally had a bit of an appetite. I had been drinking fluid all day, but no food. I wanted to stay hydrated just incase it worked. I didn’t want an IV in the hospital. In order to refuse it, I knew I had to be well hydrated. We had BBQ steak and a nice green salad and some fruit for dinner. I was so bummed that after all that work and feeling sick that I was not having any contractions. I was still just having the Braxton-Hicks ones that I had been having for weeks. We got Kaleb to bed and started watching the movie, Pirates of the Caribbean. Tim fixed me some water to soak my feet in and then took my toe nail polish off. My Mom gave me a foot massage and rubbed my ankles since they were so swollen. At around 11pm I had been sitting for a while so I needed to use the bathroom. Tim got me some socks because my feet were oily from the foot massage. I went to the bathroom and peed. When I was standing up I felt a ****** POP****** and my water gushed out. Most of it landed in the toilet. I sat back down and hollered for Tim. I said "Tim My water just broke". Both My Mom and Tim came to the bathroom door. Tim asked "Are you sure?" I said "Yes I’m sure" My Mom says, "oh my you need a towel, and you need to get dressed" So they start scrambling around. They bring me a clean pair of undies and I shove one of Kaleb’s diapers into them to soak up any leakage. I put on some clothes and sit back on the couch in the living room. I call the on-call line for my Dr office. Dr Meline is on call. He says for me to come in right away. I told him that my contractions haven’t started yet so I will finish packing my bag, wait for my doula and then we will be in. He says OK, but I could tell he is irritated. I call my doula Sara at around 11:15. Sara is asleep. But she gets up and makes it here in record time. In the meantime I call my Aunt Kathy to alert her I am in labor. She lives 3 time zones away. So I woke her up too!
Tim wanted to go to the store and pick up a few things before we left for the hospital. I figured that since I hadn’t starting contracting yet and Sara wasn’t even here yet that he could go. My Mom was freaking out that we were so calm. So Tim left and Mom helped me finish packing my bag. As I was kneeling on the floor zipping up my suitcase I got my first contractions. It was about 11:45. Tim got home around Midnight and Sara got here about 5 minutes after that. I wanted to take a picture of my belly before we left for the baby book. I look way to happy and chipper to be too far into labor, right?!?!?!?
And then I went into Kaleb’s room to kiss him goodbye. I was crying when I kissed him because I was leaving him at home with Grandma and I knew that he would wake up to a brand new world with a sibling. I knew the transition was going to be hard. On my way back down the hall I got a very strong contraction that I had to lean against the wall and breathe through. It kinda reminded me… "hey get moving lady you have a baby to birth".
We left for the hospital at around 12:17am. The car ride was horrible. The position was bad and I hated feeling the pressure in my butt when I was sitting. I wanted to MOVE! In between contractions I told them I did not want an epidural for any reason.. I told them to stall me if I asked and to just coach me through. They agreed. We all knew that this was sane Jen talking. And that is decision was the one I had been working for all along.
When we got to the hospital Tim tried to drop me off at the door and let the nurse wheel me into the L & D floor. I refused. I was not a sick person I did not need a wheel chair. I could walk up. We parked in the garage and walked up, I insisted on helping carry my own pillow and camera bag. We got upstairs and into a room around 1am. I used the bathroom to give them their sample. I HATED sitting on the toilet. My contractions would double peak and become quite intense while sitting on the toilet. Dr. Meline had OK’d me refusing the IV so the nurse did not hassle me once she checked my urine and saw that I was well hydrated. She wanted me in a gown but I refused and put my own nightgown on. I had put snaps at the shoulders so that it was accessible, but it was soft and fit me better than the hospital gowns. Besides, I was not a sick person. I was a pregnant women having a baby.
I did not want a cervical check at that point but the nurse wanted to monitor the baby for 20-30 minutes. I got on the bed and let her adjust the monitors. I wanted to Move so sitting in bed was uncomfortable and I complained about it. Tera was my nurse and she asked the mile long list of questions while she monitored me and I coped with the contractions. Sara and Tim would rub my arms and say encouraging things to me to coach me through.
At 1:35am I asked her to check me and see where we were at. Basically I was in the bed, I know she wanted to check me and I didn’t want to have to get back in the bed later. So she checked me I was 3 cm dilated, 80 % effaced, anterior cervix and baby was at –2 station. So some good progress, my cervix was lined up where it was supposed to be, baby had come down and I was thinning out more. After she checked me I got up to walk around. I would slow dance with Tim, while Sara held a warm rice pack on my uterus really low. Every time I would have a contraction I would gush out more fluid. I hated the way it felt running down my leg and Sara was tired of sopping it up with paper towels off the floor. They did not want me to wear undies. So we grabbed a small hand towel and I held that between my legs while I walked around. Perfect! No fluid on the floor or legs!
Tim was really good about keeping me drinking water. After every contraction he would give me a sip. But that in turn kept me running to the toilet. I hated the toilet. I was also having lots of rectal pressure but thanks to the castor oil I had NOTHING left in there! I kept saying, "I can’t believe I am here and we are going to see our baby soon." I wanted to labor in water since it had worked so well with my 1st labor. I went into the tub around 2am. Sara would rub my shoulder and Tim would spray the parts of me that the water didn't cover. My Contractions are in my back and I am having a hard time relaxing my hips. I want to move again.
At 2:40 I am out of the tub. Slow dancing seems to be the only way to keep my hips and pelvis relaxed. Tera wants to monitor the baby again. I tell her I am not sitting down. So she squats next to where Tim and I are slow dancing and holds the monitor in place. After the monitoring is done I try all kinds of positions, sitting in the rocking chair, well that hurts my butt. I am feeling nauseated. My contractions are about 2 –3 minutes apart and about 50 sec long. I am saying things like "this sucks I don’t like it anymore". I try to lean over the birth ball on my knees in the bed. I just can’t get comfortable. I try laying on my side. Tim is applying a little counter pressure from behind. It feels good for a while.
At around 3:55 I was asking for the epidural. I was feeling so uncomfortable and not coping well with the contractions. Tera checks me again at 3:57am since I have to be at a 4cm to get an epidural. I am 4cm, 100%effaced probably –2 or –1 station but baby’s head is applied nicely to cervix. I am defeated by the news. Only 4cm?!?!?! I was so bummed. Sara and Tim are telling me how great I am doing and to just take one contraction at a time. I am saying "you are lying, I am not doing great I am out of control and freaking out" I tell them "I WANT AN EPIDURAL" Tim says "let’s try the tub again." I agree and climb in. I am on my side and Tim is applying pressure to my top hip. It really helps me cope with the pain. While in the tub I tell Tim that "I am angry and that I am worried I will look back at this experience and hate it all". Tim starts to feel bad but holds his ground and reminds me of all we have worked for and how close I really am. Since I feel like I am getting NO where with Tim I turn my frustrations on Sara. Poor girl!
We all know I have to have an IV before they can do the epidural and be monitored again. And since I am a hard stick for an IV I know I need IV therapy to put it in. I tell Sara to "Go get the fucking nurse and get IV therapy down here NOW". Everyone knows I am in transition EXCEPT me! In the meantime I am in the tub and I start to feel different. The contractions are different and I feel like they are REALLY moving the baby down. Sara comes back in and says IV therapy is on the way. I start to freak out and say "these contractions are different, they are pushing contractions". I want out of the tub NOW! So they get me out and onto the bed. Since I feel like pushing Tera checks me again. It is 4:40am, I am 6cm and baby is –1 station. I am grunting at the peak of each contraction. Tera tells me to stop because I will bruise my cervix. So I start to blow blow blow. IV Therapy has my IV in place by 4:50am. I am on my back, semi upright on the bed. I am still trying so hard not to push. "these are pushing contractions, I am pushing I can’t help it". They get me on my side and lower the head of the bed. Tim is still doing his counter pressure. Tera checks me again at 4:52, I am 8cm. She scrambles off the bed and tells me I don’t have time for an epidural and that she is going to call Dr. Meline. I am secretly relieved that I can’t have an epidural. Sara and Tim are coaching me through and helping me breath and blow. I would bury my head into the pillow and grunt at the peak. Sara and Tim were telling me to breath. It was horrible to not be able to listen to my body. The nurse comes back in and tells me not to push, I ask her why and she says the Dr is not here yet.
All the sudden a resident that I have NEVER seen before comes in the room. She is shaking and looks scared. She gets dressed quickly. I say "the baby is HERE" I am still trying not to push but grunting a bit at the peak of each contraction. The Dr is finally ready. They get me on my back and pull the towel from between my legs. You can see the baby’s head. I am having a hard time getting my legs apart. I don’t know if it is because I couldn't push for so long, or if I was just scared. So Tim is pulling one leg and Sara is pulling the other. I finally can push! I am screaming that it hurts and the nurse Tera said "well yeah it hurts" Like duh. I was not impressed with her. The Dr has her hands inside of me pushing down. I ask her what she is doing she says "I am keeping the baby from coming out". I am like "what?!?!?!?" thinking back I think she meant that she was keeping me from tearing, but it hurt very badly and I really wanted to kick her in the head. LOL!
I get the baby’s head half way out. I can feel my tissue stretch and it burns. I reach down and feel the baby’s head. It is all squishy and soft. I get the head out and the Dr stalls me saying that there is a cord. She unwraps the cord and I instinctively flip my weight onto one hip to make more room for the shoulders and I can feel the baby rotate. One more push and out the baby comes. It is 5:09am! Tim looks between the baby’s legs and says….. "IT’S A GIRL!" I am so excited, relieved exhausted. I start crying!
They hand her to me and I hold her while they rub her down. I am crying and saying "we did it, we did it" to Tim and Sara. I felt such a sense of pride and accomplishment in my birth! I was so happy she was healthy and a GIRL!!!!!.The Dr having not had time to read my birth plan that requested delayed cord clamping, clamps the cord and directs Tim to cut her cord almost immediately. She turns blue and is having trouble breathing. They whisk her away to the warmer to give her oxygen. I am furious that they cut her cord.
At this point the Dr is checking me out to see if I tore. I am screaming in pain because it hurts. She is applying traction to the cord. I ask her what she is doing. She says the placenta needs to come out. I ask her why she is rushing the placenta? I tell her to stop pulling and to wait. She doesn’t. The nurse tells me that Moms who have babies so close together (only 18 months between Kaleb & this baby girl) often have boggy uterus's and can hemorrhage. I ask if I am bleeding too much right now. She says No. I tell the Dr. to stop pulling. She stops but it is too late, I feel the placenta has detached and is waiting to be pushed out. I am not happy. (later I would be even more unhappy since I ended up with a uterine infection from a piece of retained placenta or membrane). Dr. Meline arrives. Only about 20 minutes late! He checks me out and says that I have a small tear at my perineum and also one beneath my urethra. I tore in both those places with Kaleb’s birth so I am not surprised. Neither tear needs any stitches. They finally bring my baby girl back to me and tell me that she is 20 1/2 inches long, 8lbs 1 oz and has a 14cm head.
Her apgars were 7 and 8 because of the cord issues. Tim & I announce her name: Jasmyn Kathleen. I am in awe of her beauty and how awake and alert she is. She wants to nurse and start to root around. She latches on beautifully! Around 5:40am we call my Aunt Kathy and announce her name. She is thrilled! Tim & I are in awe of our baby girl and of our birth process. I learned so much about myself and felt so much more connected to Tim after going through this process. And we both felt so blessed to have a daughter. She is so beautiful and peaceful.
Our first Family picture.
Then
Now
No comments:
Post a Comment