Yup. There is the ticker. As of today it has been 6 1/2 months since we started on this journey to try to get pregnant with baby #4. It has been a bumpy ride and I don't know if the end is near. It makes me sad. And it makes me ANGRY for all those years that I took for granted my fertility. I figured that I could "always" get pregnant when I wanted to. Boy do those words sting now. So this ticker will set on my blog until I get pregnant or give up on that dream.
The next thing is that I am so very sorry blogland that I have been MIA. We celebrated 4 birthdays this month, threw A huge B-day party for all of us and went on a 4 day camping trip. Busy describes our July. So that is why I haven't been around keeping you updated. But I see by the visitor counter that you all have been checking in and have probably been disappointed by the lack of a new post. My apologies. I hope that things will get back to normal now that we are home again. I have lots to catch everyone up on as well. I promise to do that over the next few days.
Lastly..... And this is a big one.... When is enough really enough? When do you just call it quits on a relationship that brings you more pain than joy? When do you stop trying to improve it and just get to the acceptance part? (Before anyone jumps to conclusions.... Tim and I are very happy. This is NOT about him). Now don't get me wrong. I am not blameless in the toxic relationship. I carry a lifetime of blame. So when is enough really enough? Can I just accept that the relationship is what it is and not expect more nor put more energy into it than I receive back? The hardest part for me is when my expectations get up and then something happens to disappoint me. So is the answer just to not have any expectations of this person? I just really feel compelled to protect myself and my kids from hurt feelings and disappointments over and over again.
Does anyone out there have advice? Comments are highly needed.
2 comments:
Well dear this is a hard one for me as I am struggling as well and I will email you privately and let ya in on what is happening. I do understand and feel what you are sayng I am gonna say that once you feel like you have given all u can give then thats enough. Until the other person gives a shit about you and your feelings on things forget them. Let me realize how much they need you and you can and will survive without them. Good luck hun I am here if you need to talk I work Fri-Tues so if ya wanna talk I am home Wed and Thurs usually. I will listen!!Good luck!
relationshipps change over time and may not be on the same terms as they were once. A close person may drift away or a person not so invloved in your life may become more active and more precious. At times a relationship or the way we relate to someone may need to be evaluated: what does this person mean to me, what is the nature of our current relationship, what was or is their role in your (and your family's) life.
Then you can invest as much of yourself as you'd like based on your new understanding of how this person currently fits into your life.
This in turns helps establish how much you can rely on them, count on them, or invest in them at this point in time. we can determine our expectations form this person or relationship.
This way we can more easily not set our selves up for a let down. Just got to know where they stand with you and your family at this juncture.
Some people fad away form our lives all together and some drift in and out, just knowing where the relationship stands and what they mean to you, helps.
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